Tag Archives: Happiness

Mermaid or Whale?

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Recently, in a large city in France, a poster featuring a young, thin, and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym.It read: “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?”

A middle-aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman pictured on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym. She had a whale of a lot to say:

“To Whom It May Concern,

Whales are always surrounded by friends: dolphins, sea lions, and curious humans. They have an active sex life, get pregnant, and have adorable baby whales. They enjoy stuffing themselves with shrimp, playing and swimming in the sea, and visiting wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bering Sea, and the coral reefs of Polynesia.

Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. ?They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans.They are loved, protected, and admired by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don’t exist.If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of psychoanalysts due to their identity crisis. Fish or human would prove quite a quandary for even the most skilled of therapists.

They don’t have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them, not to mention how could they have sex? Just look at them … where is IT? Therefore, they don’t have kids either. Not to mention, who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

P.S. We are in an age when the media attempts to convince us that only skinny people are beautiful. I prefer to enjoy ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver, and good chocolate with my friends. With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated, and happy.”
—-Copied from Brian Horne page—-

Secret to a Long and Happy Life

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On CNBC’s Make It, 107-year-old Shirley Hodes shares her secret to a long and happy life: Don’t wait for your dreams to come true.

Shirley Hodes, who celebrated her 107th birthday earlier this month in North Carolina, says, “Not everyone has their dreams come true.” If you want to be happy in life, especially as you age, “you must look at other things besides dreams.”

That philosophy means reorienting yourself towards finding joy in small things, in what you can control, and in wanting what you already have. It is about being grateful.

“You must be content with who you are and what you can expect of yourself. Find things that are satisfying,” Hodes says.

Cultivating this kind of happiness mindset requires effort. But the work can pay off: Positivity is linked to a longer and healthier life.

Here are top tips for staying happy as you get older.

  • Think of yourself as fortunate and blessed. Be thankful for all the things and people currently in your life.
  • Believe that tomorrow will be better than today.
  • Focus less on what others have and more on the aspects of life you can feel grateful for.  Don’t get swept up in jealousy or resentment,
  • Find delight daily in the small things. I listened to books on tape, took walks, watched old movies on TV, and had a scoop of ice cream after dinner. Most importantly, family and friends.

Source: 107-year-old shares her secret to a long and happy life: Don’t wait for your dreams to come true  https://www.cnbc.com/2023/09/21/107-year-old-shares-her-secrets-to-happiness-as-you-age.html

Happiness

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“Since you get more joy out of giving joy to others, you should put a good deal of thought into the happiness that you are able to give.” —Eleanor Roosevelt

“A teacher gave a balloon to every student, who had to inflate it, write their name on it and throw it in the hallway. The teacher then mixed all the balloons. The students were then given 5 minutes to find their own balloon.

Despite a hectic search, no one found their balloon. At that point, the teacher told the students to take the first balloon that they found and hand it to the person whose name was written on it. Within 5 minutes, everyone had their own balloon.

The teacher said to the students: “These balloons are like happiness. We will never find it if everyone is looking for their own. But if we care about other people’s happiness, we’ll find ours too.”

Top Five Regrets of the Dying

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Bronnie Ware, an Australian palliative care nurse, recorded patients’ dying epiphanies and put her observations into a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying.

Ware wrote of the phenomenal clarity of vision that people gain at the end of their lives, and how you might learn from her patients’ wisdom. “When questioned about any regrets they had or anything they would do differently,” she says, “common themes surfaced again and again.”

Here are the top five regrets of the dying, as witnessed by Bonnie Ware:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

“This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and look back clearly on it, it is easy to see how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most people had not honored even a half of their dreams and had to die knowing that it was due to choices they had made, or not made. Health brings a freedom very few realize, until they no longer have it.”

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.

“This came from every male patient that I nursed. They missed their children’s youth and their partner’s companionship. Women also spoke of this regret, but as most were from an older generation, many of the female patients had not been breadwinners. All of the men I nursed deeply regretted spending so much of their lives on the treadmill of a work existence.”

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

“Many people suppressed their feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence and never became who they were truly capable of becoming. Many developed illnesses relating to the bitterness and resentment they carried as a result.”

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.

“Often they would not truly realize the full benefits of old friends until their dying weeks and it was not always possible to track them down. Many had become so caught up in their own lives that they had let golden friendships slip by over the years. There were many deep regrets about not giving friendships the time and effort that they deserved. Everyone misses their friends when they are dying.”

5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.

“This is a surprisingly common one. Many did not realize until the end that happiness is a choice. They had stayed stuck in old patterns and habits. The so-called ‘comfort’ of familiarity overflowed into their emotions, as well as their physical lives. Fear of change had them pretending to others, and to their selves, that they were content, when deep within, they longed to laugh properly and have silliness in their life again.”

References:

  1. Susie Steiner, Top five regrets of the dying, The Guardian, February 1, 2012.  https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2012/feb/01/top-five-regrets-of-the-dying

Mindset of Building Wealth

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Your mindset is a set of beliefs that shape how you make sense of the world and yourself. It influences how you think, feel, and behave in any given situation or circumstance. It means that what you believe about yourself impacts your success or failure or happiness or wealth.

Simply, your beliefs shape your mindset. Mindset is a collection of beliefs and thoughts. It is a way of thinking:

“Mindsets are those collection of beliefs and thoughts that make up the mental attitude, inclination, habit or disposition that predetermines a person’s interpretations and responses to events, circumstances and situations.”

According to Stanford psychologist and best selling author Dr. Carol Dweck, your beliefs play a pivotal role in what you want and whether you achieve it. Dweck has found that it is your mindset that plays a significant role in determining achievement and success.

Mindsets can influence how people behave in a wide range of situations in life. For example, as people encounter different situations, their mind triggers a specific mindset that then directly impacts their behavior in that situation.

Your mindset plays a critical role in how you cope with life’s challenges. With a positive growth  mindset, adults are more likely to persevere in the face of setbacks. Instead of throwing in the towel, adults with a positive growth mindset view it as an opportunity to learn and grow.

In short, your mindset not only impacts how you perceive the world around you, but also how you see and believe in yourself and your abilities.

Gratitude Mindset

It’s important to be grateful for everything you have in life. For having a roof over your head, a paying job, a family, a good supply of food and water. Simply, gratitude is the “affirmation of goodness”.

Gratitude is a super power! It has been scientifically proven to be good for your health, your well-being, your building wealth, and your relationships.

Psychology research has demonstrated that practicing gratitude is good for improving your health, your well-being, your building wealth, and your relationships.

We often forget to be thankful for what we have…have a mindset and attitude of gratitude.

If you can be grateful for what you have, you won’t take anything or anyone for granted in your life, and you’ll be wealthier and happier in the long run.

Your mindsets have a lot to do with self-confidence, self-esteem as well as self-development and the desire for self-improvement and being grateful.

References:

  1. https://sourcesofinsight.com/what-is-mindset/
  2. https://www.verywellmind.com/what-is-a-mindset-2795025
  3. https://wealthygorilla.com/15-different-types-mindsets-people/

Gratitude

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“I have every possession I want. I have a lot of friends who have a lot more possessions. But in some cases, I feel the possession possesses them, rather than the other way around.” ~ Warren Buffett

Never allow all the things you selfishly covet or you want make you forget about all the things you have or currently possess. Put a little gratitude in your life today and be thankful for all you already possess.

Moreover, happiness doesn’t mean everything is pleasing or perfect. Instead, happiness means that you can choose to see beyond the problems and imperfections, and embrace an attitude of gratitude.

The endless pursuit of hollow amenities and fruitless assets that barely add any value to your life are often so intoxicating that people loose sight of things that truly make them happy and bring them joy such as personal relationships, joy and peace in abundance.

“Sometimes you have to stop staring at your problems and start seeing how beautiful life really is.” ~ Anonymous

Don’t wait for great. Be Great everyday! Don’t allow a little negativity keep you from feeling grateful for everything that is going right and for everything that is good and pleasing in your life.

Gratitude must become a 24 hour / 365 day mindset, so that you don’t take what you have for granted.

Research shows that gratitude can:

  • Help you make friends. One study found that thanking a new acquaintance makes them more likely to seek a more lasting relationship with you.
  • Improve your physical health. People who exhibit gratitude report fewer aches and pains, a general feeling of health, more regular exercise, and more frequent checkups with their doctor than those who don’t.
  • Improve your psychological health and emotional well-being. Grateful people enjoy higher wellbeing and happiness and suffer from reduced symptoms of depression.
  • Enhance empathy and reduces aggression. Those who show their gratitude are less likely to seek revenge against others and more likely to behave in a prosocial manner, with sensitivity and empathy.
  • Improve your sleep. Practicing gratitude regularly can help you sleep longer and better.
  • Enhance your self-esteem. People who are grateful have increased self-esteem, partly due to their ability to appreciate other peoples’ accomplishments.
  • Increase in mental strength. Grateful people have an advantage in overcoming trauma and enhanced resilience, helping them to bounce back from highly stressful situations.

References:

  1. https://positivepsychology.com/gratitude-exercises/

May you have Peace, Joy and Patience in Abundance!

Life Purpose in Five Minutes

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Adam Leipzig gave a TED talk regarding discovering your Life Purpose in 5 minutes. In his talk, he discusses a five step process to find meaning and purpose in your life.

In a non-scientific survey of Yale University classmates attending a college reunion, Adam Leipzig discovered to his dismay — despite financial, material and career success — that:

  • The majority of attendees, eighty percent (80%), were unhappy with their lives, and
  • A minority of attendees, twenty percent (20%), were happy

He explained that the people who were happy with their lives knew their life purpose.  For this to take 5 minutes, you need to already know the answers to these 5 things or questions:

  1. Who you are
  2. What you do
  3. Who you do it for
  4. What those people want or need to better their lives
  5. How the people you serve change or transform as a result of what you gave or did for them.

The most successful and happy people in almost every field and walk of life  are outward focus and focus on the people they serve first and foremost.

So, when people ask you, “what do you do”, just respond how what you do changes the lives of people. For example: “I help people build wealth, better manage their money, and achieve financial freedom”.  In a way, this can become your personal brand and elevator pitch. And it can be that simplite.

Adam Leipzig is a producer, executive and distributor. and has produced more than 300 stage plays and live events, and one of the founders of the Los Angeles Theatre Center.

Your Life Purpose comes down to what you really want to do to serve others and what you really enjoy doing to serve other, in the end. What you feel the most alive and happy doing while serving others.

References:

  1. https://www.transcendyourlimits.com/find-life-purpose

Two Wolves

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An old Cherokee is teaching his grandson about life. “A fight is going on inside me,” he said to the boy.

“It is a terrible fight and it is between two wolves.

  • One is evil – he is anger, envy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.” He continued,
  • “The other is good – he is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion, and faith.

The same fight is going on inside you – and inside every other person, too.”

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather, “Which wolf will win?”

The old Cherokee simply replied, “The one you feed.”

Feeding yourself with or focusing on negative thoughts can bring out the worst in yourself.

Conversely, positive thinking fuels the goodness within us. We exude joy, peace, hope, kindness, and love.

Essentially, what you focus your mind and thoughts on grows.

References:

  1. https://www.virtuesforlife.com/two-wolves/

Gratitude Research

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Gratitude is “an affirmation of goodness and a recognition that this goodness is sourced outside the self.” This doesn’t mean that life is perfect and peaceful, but when you look at life as a whole, gratitude encourages you to identify some amount of goodness and joy in your life. Dr. Robert Emmons

Research indicates that gratitude can lower blood pressure, improve immune function, reduce cardiac inflammation, increase happiness, improve relationships, and decrease depression. 

Dr. Robert Emmons, professor of psychology at the University of California, Davis, researcher, and author of the book Thanks! How the New Science of Gratitude Can Make You Happier, suggests that you “integrate gratitude into your daily life, rather than make it something you need to add to an already busy day”.

He recommends that you simply make it a point to notice opportunities that you can be thankful for and practice gratitude regularly.

Practicing gratitude can also make you better equipped to handle the difficulties of life that inevitably arise. In fact, according to Emmons, it’s an essential part of the process of healing from trauma. Even despair can be mitigated by the experience of appreciation for the good, however slight it might be.

Many survivors of the Holocaust, when asked to tell their stories, remember most strongly the feelings of gratitude for food, shelter, or clothing that was offered to them. This sense of thankfulness for the small blessings helped them maintain their humanity despite experiencing a horrific tragedy.

Additionally, many people with life-threatening illnesses also report decreased distress and increased positive emotions when they practice gratitude.

10 tips to fit gratitude in your life

Here are ten ways to become a more thankful person, according to Dr. Emmons:

  1. Every day, say aloud three good things that happened. It’s also extremely powerful to express gratitude aloud when you’re alone.
  2. Keep a gratitude journal. Jot down the small things from your day that mattered to you. If you’re having a particularly rough day, you can look back through the pages of accumulated blessings in your life.
  3. Say thanks to your partner. Couples who express gratitude toward one another set up a powerful feedback loop of intimacy and trust, where both partners feel as if their needs are being met.
  4. Cool a hot temper with a quick gratitude inventory. One of the quickest ways to dispel the energy of a stormy mood is to focus your attention on what’s good. So when you’re about to lash out at someone, take a moment to do a quick inventory of five things you’re thankful for in the moment. It will help you relax and avoid saying something you’ll later regret.
  5. Thank yourself. Gratitude doesn’t always need to be focused on what other people have done for you! Make sure you give yourself a thank-you for the healthy habits you’ve cultivated in your own life.
  6. Use technology to send three gratitude messages a week. Harness the power of this technology to send out some good vibes, such as a text or Facebook comment, to tell your friends why you appreciate them.
  7. Savor the good moments. If you notice you’re feeling happy, stop what you’re doing and pay attention for a few minutes. Notice exactly how you feel, including the sensations in your body and the thoughts you’re having. Later, when you’re trying to inspire gratitude, you can remember this moment and experience the benefits all over again.
  8. Check for silver linings. Even the most difficult life challenges come with some benefit—you just have to look to find them. Making a mistake teaches you a lesson. When things feel hard, ask yourself: What’s good here?
  9. Look outward, not inward. Robert Emmons says people are more likely to feel grateful when they put their focus on others, rather than getting caught up in their own inner narratives about how things should have gone. Empathy for others can trigger a sense of gratitude, and people who have an outward focus tend to experience stronger benefits.
  10. Change your perspective. If you struggle to come up with something to feel grateful for, put yourself in the shoes of someone who is experiencing misfortunes greater than your own. It will inspire gratitude for your own healthy body and circumstances, which you may have taken for granted otherwise.

It is vitally important to your health and overall emotional well being to cultivate a sense of gratitude in your life. Research confirms that gratitude effectively increases happiness and reduces depression.

References:

  1. https://www.takingcharge.csh.umn.edu/making-gratitude-part-everyday-life-tips-dr-robert-emmons
  2. https://www.takingcharge.csh.umn.edu/10-ways-be-more-thankful-person

In All Things Be Grateful

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God is good…All the time.

God is good in every situation and every circumstance, not just in those situations we view as good or favorable. He is with us even during challenging times and problems.

We don’t have to like everything that enters our lives, but we can be grateful for the fact Jesus is with us in whatever we are going through.

Thomas Edison once said that “I’ve never made a mistake. I’ve only learned from experience.”

“We haven’t failed. We now know a thousand things that won’t work, so we are much closer to finding what will.” ~ Thomas Edison

In all things be grateful

Expressing gratitude is an essential skill everyone needs to learn and practice to achieve success and to learn and grow.

Research shows that it impossible to be both fearful and grateful simultaneously. Moreover, it’s possible to worry and to be anxious, and be grateful.

You should be grateful for the multitude of blessings you experience in your life daily. You should as well be grateful for life’s problems and challenges; and view problems and challenges for what they are, opportunities to learn, grow and improve.

So always be grateful and always remember and embrace the adage, in life, there are either successes or learning opportunities.

References:

  1. https://inspireafire.com/can-we-be-grateful-in-all-things/
  2. https://www.internetpillar.com/thomas-edison-quotes/
  3. https://www.inc.com/kevin-daum/37-quotes-from-thomas-edison-that-will-bring-out-your-best.html