Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.
In other words, don’t waste energy resenting fools for their foolishness; reflect on why you continue to invite them into your life. Growth begins when you stop blaming the clown, and start questioning why you’re at the circus.
Sometimes, the problem isn’t the chaos around you — it’s your choice to keep stepping into it and keeping it apart of your life. Growth means recognizing patterns, setting boundaries, and walking away from what no longer serves your peace.
Bottom line, you shouldn’t waste time getting angry at people who consistently behave foolishly, immaturely, or manipulatively (“the clown”). Instead, the real question is why you keep giving them your attention or allowing them into your life (“going to the circus”).
Protect your energy and mental wellbeing. Stop giving the circus your audience.
“Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.” ~ Dr. Robert Waldinger
Since 1938, Harvard University tracked in a research study, The Harvard Study of Adult Development, the entire lives of 724 men (268 sophomores and 456 Boston teenagers from disadvantaged backgrounds) for 75+ years. They measured success, health, wealth, fame, and happiness.
The study continued for decades. It continued through wars, economic booms and busts, technological revolutions.
The researchers conducted interviews, medical exams, brain scans, blood tests. They talked to family members.
The result was that one factor predicted happiness better than anything else. And it wasn’t money, possessions, fame, or achievement.
Quality of Relationships
The single biggest predictor of happiness and fulfillment: The quality of your relationships. It was not the number of friends, whether you’re married, or your social media following.
The single biggest predictor of health, happiness and fulfillment was the depth and authenticity of your connections.
The data was clear: People with strong relationships:
– Lived longer
– Had healthier bodies
– Had healthier brains
– Reported greater happiness
Even when controlling for wealth, fame, IQ, and genetics.
The most surprising finding was that at age 50, cholesterol levels didn’t predict how long men would live.
But satisfaction with relationships did. The men who were most satisfied with their relationships at 50 were the healthiest at 80.
Loneliness Kills
Study director Dr. Robert Waldinger explains:
“Loneliness kills. It’s as powerful as smoking or alcoholism.”
Men who lived isolated lives:
– Died earlier
– Experienced cognitive decline sooner
– Reported less happiness
– Had worse health outcomes
The study found that relationship quality matters more than quantity.
– One toxic relationship caused more harm than being alone.
– High-conflict marriages without affection were worse for health than divorce.
Quality always trumped quantity.
Money findings were equally clear:
Once basic needs were met, more money didn’t increase happiness. Men worth millions were no happier than those with modest incomes—unless their relationships were strong.
Wealth without connection led to emptiness and loneliness.
The most powerful conclusion:
“Good relationships don’t just protect our bodies; they protect our brains.”
People in secure relationships at age 80 maintained sharper memories.
Those in disconnected relationships experienced earlier cognitive decline and earlier death.
Harvard’s researchers discovered over 75 years that meaningful relationships are the foundation of long-term health, happiness, and fulfillment.
You can grind for years with nothing to show. Then everything changes in a moment.
But the point isn’t to win fast. It’s to become unshakable, grateful and positive, no matter how long it takes to achieve your destination or goal.
The men and women who endure aren’t lucky, they’re relentless and believe in themselves.
And the world eventually moves for those men and women who are relentless and refuse to quit.
Repeat after me: I am an amazingly awesome person!, who has dealth with so many challenges, made it through it all, and is still handsome, smart, kind, grateful, intelligent and awesome.
Dear Self: I will win…I promise!
Keep going, difficult roads and journeys can lead to beautiful destinations!
Success is often less about reaching a beautiful destination and more about the process and journey—about living with purpose, staying true to who you are, and finding joy in the everyday.
Own your strengths, believe in yourself, be always grateful, and have faith and confidence in your abilities. Your self-confidence relies on your ability to focus on your talents, achievements and advantages. By simply committing to spend a little time each day to remind yourself of your strengths, you can boost your self-worth and build that confidence!
“You must always talk positive to yourself in your head.”
You will never speak to anyone more than you speak to yourself in your head. So, be kind and encouraging to yourself!
The words you tell yourself shape your thoughts, your mindset, and the life you live. Speak to yourself with the same kindness, compassion, and respect you’d give to someone you love.
Here are a few tips to help you develop a positive inner dialogue:
1. Recognize Negative Thoughts: Be mindful of when negative thoughts creep in. Awareness is the first step to change.
2. Challenge and Reframe: Ask yourself if these thoughts are realistic or helpful. Try to reframe them in a more positive light.
3. Practice Affirmations: Repeat positive affirmations daily. For example, “I am capable and resilient.”
4. Surround Yourself with Positivity: Spend time with people who uplift and support you. Their positive energy can be contagious.
5. Be Kind to Yourself: Treat yourself with the same kindness and compassion that you would offer a friend.
Remember, life is a journey, and it’s okay to have ups and downs along the way. And, being positive, happy, and grateful are choices.
Happy retirees often cultivate daily habits that contribute to their overall well-being and satisfaction.
Here are some common practices:
1. Start with a Morning Ritual: Many retirees begin their day with a calming routine, such as enjoying a cup of coffee, meditating, or taking a morning walk. They choose to be happy and grateful. This sets a positive tone for the day.
2. Embrace Routine and Spontaneity: While having a daily routine provides structure, happy retirees also leave room for spontaneous activities. This balance keeps life exciting and fulfilling.
3. Stay Connected with Loved Ones: Maintaining strong social connections is crucial. Regular interactions with family and friends help prevent loneliness and enhance emotional well-being.
4. Keep Learning and Growing: Engaging in lifelong learning, whether through hobbies, new skills, or formal education, keeps the mind sharp and provides a sense of accomplishment.
5. Stay Physically Active: Regular physical activity, such as walking, gardening, or yoga, is essential for maintaining health and vitality. Physical activity should include aerobic exercise, strength training, improving balance and stretching.
6. Practice Gratitude: Many happy retirees make it a habit to count their blessings daily and be grateful for all that they have. This practice of gratitude can significantly boost happiness and contentment. No matter how great or miserable your day, there is always a reason to be grateful.
7. Volunteer or Give Back: Contributing to the community through volunteering or other forms of giving back provides a sense of purpose and fulfillment.
These habits and activities help create a balanced, joyful, and meaningful retirement.
“Learn to be thankful for what you already have, while you pursue all that you want.” —Jim Rohn
Gratitude makes you feel good and there are concrete benefits to being grateful that translate into real-world prosperity and well-being. And, habits that cultivate gratitude benefit everyone.
Pam Grout, author of Thank and Grow Rich: A 30-Day Experiment in Shameless Gratitude and Unabashed Joy says that “Gratitude is causative energy. It plants seeds that grow into unlimited abundance.” She points out that being thankful can increase many different kinds of capital: financial, spiritual, social, creative, even adventure capital!
Gratitude opens the door for good results in every area of life. Not only can gratitude can increase your financial wealth, it increases your well-being spiritually, mentally, socially, and physically. This equates to wealth and makes for a truly rich life!
Successful business owner May McCarthy describes in her book, The Path to Wealth, how her own gratitude practice has led to increased spiritual connection, prosperity, and a well-honed intuition.
A growing body of research suggests that maintaining an attitude of gratitude can improve psychological, emotional and physical well-being.
Adults who frequently feel grateful have more energy, more optimism, more social connections and more happiness than those who do not, according to studies conducted over the past decade, writes Melinda Beck in the Wall Street Journal.
Research over the last several years has shown overwhelming benefits. The Wall Street Journal reports that an attitude of gratitude can help people experience more energy, greater optimism, more social connections, and more happiness.
In Berkeley’s Greater Good Magazine, gratitude researcher Robert Emmons says that those who practice gratitude consistently:
are more helpful, generous and compassionate
are more forgiving of others
experience greater joy and pleasure
are more outgoing and less likely to feel lonely or isolated
Cultivating an attitude of gratitude is crucial for developing a winning mindset in sports and life.
Here are some key points on how gratitude contributes to a winning athletic mindset:
Gratitude fosters a positive outlook and resilience. Athletes who practice gratitude are better able to maintain an optimistic perspective, even in the face of setbacks or losses. This positive mindset fuels their drive and determination to improve.
Expressing gratitude helps athletes appreciate the journey, not just the outcome. Instead of solely focusing on winning, grateful athletes value the process of training, learning, and growing as an athlete. This joy in the journey itself enhances their motivation and performance.
Gratitude counters a sense of entitlement. Grateful athletes recognize the opportunities, support systems, and hard work that enable their success. This humility prevents complacency and drives them to give maximum effort.
Practicing gratitude builds mental toughness. When athletes express thankfulness even after losses or failures, it helps them reframe those set
A positive mindset and an attitude of gratitude are powerful tools in winning, achieving athletic success and personal growth. Embrace them!
Your self-worth is your ceiling! ~ Jamie Kern Lima, author of Worthy!
Eighty percent (80%) of people hear their inner voice telling them they’re not enough. Jamie Kern Lima’s book WORTHY helps you unlearn the lies that lead to self-doubt and enables you to ignite your self-worth!
‘Worthy’ is a confidence-building compass, empowering you to conquer self-doubt and embrace your authentic self.
Do you allow yourself to dream big, love deeply, and pursue your most audacious goals? Remember, you are inherently worthy of all the beauty life has to offer. Embrace your worth, reach for the stars, and let your belief in your limitless potential guide you writes Jamie Kern Lima.
To craft a life filled with self-love, purpose, and unstoppable empowerment, you must believe in yourself and believe you are worthy of your hopes and dreams and of living this one precious, beautiful life as who you indeed are, states Jamie Kern Lima!
You are deserving of all the greatness that awaits!
“In life, you don’t soar to the level of your hopes and dreams, you stay stuck at the level of your self-worth. In your business, leadership, relationships, friendships, and ambitions, you don’t rise to what you believe is possible; you fall to what you believe you’re worthy of. When you build your self-worth, you change your life.” – Jamie Kern Lima.
Recently, in a large city in France, a poster featuring a young, thin, and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym.It read: “This summer, do you want to be a mermaid or a whale?”
A middle-aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman pictured on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym. She had a whale of a lot to say:
“To Whom It May Concern,
Whales are always surrounded by friends: dolphins, sea lions, and curious humans. They have an active sex life, get pregnant, and have adorable baby whales. They enjoy stuffing themselves with shrimp, playing and swimming in the sea, and visiting wonderful places like Patagonia, the Bering Sea, and the coral reefs of Polynesia.
Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. ?They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans.They are loved, protected, and admired by almost everyone in the world.
Mermaids don’t exist.If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of psychoanalysts due to their identity crisis. Fish or human would prove quite a quandary for even the most skilled of therapists.
They don’t have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them, not to mention how could they have sex? Just look at them … where is IT? Therefore, they don’t have kids either. Not to mention, who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?
P.S. We are in an age when the media attempts to convince us that only skinny people are beautiful. I prefer to enjoy ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver, and good chocolate with my friends. With time, we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated, and happy.”
—-Copied from Brian Horne page—-
On CNBC’s Make It, 107-year-old Shirley Hodes shares her secret to a long and happy life: Don’t wait for your dreams to come true.
Shirley Hodes, who celebrated her 107th birthday earlier this month in North Carolina, says, “Not everyone has their dreams come true.” If you want to be happy in life, especially as you age, “you must look at other things besides dreams.”
That philosophy means reorienting yourself towards finding joy in small things, in what you can control, and in wanting what you already have. It is about being grateful.
“You must be content with who you are and what you can expect of yourself. Find things that are satisfying,” Hodes says.
Cultivating this kind of happiness mindset requires effort. But the work can pay off: Positivity is linked to a longer and healthier life.
Here are top tips for staying happy as you get older.
Think of yourself as fortunate and blessed. Be thankful for all the things and people currently in your life.
Believe that tomorrow will be better than today.
Focus less on what others have and more on the aspects of life you can feel grateful for. Don’t get swept up in jealousy or resentment,
Find delight daily in the small things. I listened to books on tape, took walks, watched old movies on TV, and had a scoop of ice cream after dinner. Most importantly, family and friends.
